Home #Real Talks Corner With Deespeakable Depression: Dark Moments

Depression: Dark Moments

by admin

Hey, fam! I guess it is still okay to say Happy New Month! So months ago when I talked about insecurities, someone suggested that I talk about depression and I completely agree. It is a conversation that we must have and should be having regularly.

I will start by saying that Depression is real and it can happen to anyone. As humans, at some point in our lives, we may find ourselves in really dark places due to a variety of reasons. Months ago there were different cases of attempted suicides and suicides. We tried talking about it during one of our youth meetings in the church, the topic was so deep we had to have a part three or so and they were still questions to be asked.

The crazy part for me was when I read the comments that some people were dropping under these posts. They were sickening and very disappointing. Comments like “this guy/or this girl mum she”, “so as this girl fine like this, she no get sense? She goes kill herself because of man”, the list could go on and on.

I do not believe and commend the idea of suicide, I strongly believe that It is never a solution to anything, it is, in fact, a sin. It still does not warrant some of the judgmental statements that people drop in the comment section. Someone who is depressed or going through a dark phase and is very suicidal might see such a comment and instead of getting any form of encouragement, he or she sees a bunch of judgmental, self-righteous people condemning. Instead of seeing support, the person might just come to the conclusion that no one actually gets it and hence suicide might be the way out.

I was talking to a friend days ago and he told me something that really shocked me, I have no idea how I would have reacted if it was me. He told me he had to spend ten years in the university, not because he failed or anything. He was in his final year for a five years course when they realized the course has not even been accredited in the school. Five! Years of school fees, house rent, handouts, transportation. Let’s not even go into the aspect of sleepless nights trying to study. All wasted, some of his mates committed suicide because they could not take the pain of feeling like a failure and having to start afresh when the rest of the world and their mates have moved on.

People have different backgrounds, the same way they are going through different trails. Some people have been raped and abused, some people are currently still being raped and abused and they can not open up because of the kind of judgment society we live in. Pressure from peers, society, family, etc. School struggles, people have made mistakes that continually hunts them, people have lost their savings and jobs due to bad investments, etc. Most times instead of getting encouragements and support, things we see are judgments, insults, and discouragements

Truth is, the darkness in such moments often prevents one from seeing the possibility of a light at the end of the tunnel. While others have summoned the courage to pull themselves by the grace of God out of this pit, others are still struggling to do the same with little or no encouragement.

Pulling out of the pit of depression is a whole lot. It is a conscious move; in the sense that while all seems negative, you have to stay positive. It is something we must make a decision to do for ourselves. Though we need the encouragement from our friends, family and loved ones the truth is no word, no encouragement, no amount of love and support will ever be enough if you do not make the decision to try your best to get out of that situation with the hope and faith in what God can do next.

T.D Jakes once wrote “Most times we go around looking for who to bear the weight of the healing we need. Real and complete healing comes from the one who made you and your heart that was broken in the first place”.

When it looks like its all crumbling down, when the nights are filled with tears heartbreaks and disappoints we need to turn to God. In moments where what is going on is too much for human minds to resolve, then we need to turn it over to God. When we face situations that have no rhythm of reason; somewhere beyond the passion and the pain, there is God.

When I am overwhelmed, I always remember that Papa said to cast all my cares upon Him, for He truly, deeply, genuinely cares about me. And when it starts to get crazy Philippians 4 vs 4 talks about not being anxious. Instead of making requests known to God through prayer, thanksgiving, and supplication.
When it starts turnioniown, I look up to God. How about you? What do you do?

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Samsong August 10, 2019 - 11:19 am

The Bible has the answers to all our questions in life, when you are discouraged thinking all is lost count your blessings look back and see where God has brought you from I tell if you’re able to think deep of all God has done for you in the past you will discover that the future holds great things…. Cast your burden upon Jesus he alone could bear it for because he cares…. If you are depressed in any way never allow negative people weigh you down because they are of the devil their father look up to Jesus

Emah Purple September 2, 2019 - 1:27 pm

When people talk about depression anyhow, I just look at them because you never know until you know. I know how it tastes do be in the belly of darkness and Dee, you are so right. Thanks for the amazing post.

Desewa Martins September 4, 2019 - 12:09 pm

thank you Emah!

Cokesbaba September 8, 2019 - 1:42 pm

This is a sensitive topic that everyone goes through whether they admit it or not… eg. When you are unhappy because you repeated a class (depressed), when your dad didn’t get you that computer game or doll that all your school mates have (depressed) when you are trying hard and all you get is being rebuked (depressed), when you couldn’t gain addmission in university and waited a year or more (depressed), when your friend came home gisting about lectures and you are still battling JAMB (depressed), when you finished school and couldn’t get a job and its been 2years now (depressed), when you got a job and got cheated out of promotion after working so hard (depressed), when all you laid your hands on didn’t seem to work (depressed), that you are not where you are meant to be at that stage of your life (depressed)… we could do this all day. The fact is we all experience various level of depression, some call it stress or anxiety or mid-life-crises or a phase but it is all a stage of depression. The idea of depression is burn out of a “want” or a “need” that we cannot at that point obtain.

Tell you what, people who laugh at others due to extreme depression are actually showing signs or depression. Some people cover theirs by preying on others. The best way to get out of these depressed state which, will come one way or another, is to be positive, surround your self with positive people, read positive literature and remember that no matter how bad it get, someone had it worse and are better for it today.

So in the spirit of love an friendship, stay positive because life’s good.

Desewa Martins September 8, 2019 - 4:29 pm

wow…so true.
Thank you very much for sharing. Whether we like it or not, at some point in our lives we find ourselves in situations that might break our hearts and put us in a really bad place but like you said, stay positive because life’s good.


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